random shit

Apparently, I have a 'Manic mode', which I switch to when talking to girls who aren't her, either she thinks I'm cooler or that I'm a psychopath, though in her eyes I think they're the same thing

Manic has a job!!!!!

I finally have a stable job, 60 quid a week and all I really have to do is carry heavy shit, simple. :)

Rugby photo

They're making a sort of profile things for all the players at my club and I liked the picture of me,

Look at me resplendent in all my rugby glory

This is what happens after I see babyfied serial killers, and have a bit to drink, but that is irrelevant, I unfortunately unashamed of this. Though it does seem like some obscene abomination.

Hump

*Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft, hurmp*

Why do I always seem to cycle

One moment I'm happy, healthy, and ready to do anything..... then I'm back to shit..... at least this time it ain't my fault, unless I can be blamed for being cheated on. Now if this was a story I'd have some long winded partially elegant speech about anger and Malice and the beautiful symphony of hate I felt rise up in me. Though it isn't one of my stories... I don't really feel anything, just sort of empty, as if everything that makes up me has been swallowed up by the gaping maw inside of me, even when I saw her kissing the other bloke, I wasn't angry at her... only disappointed. I just guess it's how the world goes.... I was doing so well too, but now I just feel empty and alone.

-That guy over there

How my friend views Dreaming Truths Manic

Well my friend read dreaming truths, after going on a binge of watching doctor Who, so she thought it'd be funny to write a mix of the two, I'll split it into two parts as it was quite long.

Manic Muse was running today, he always seemed to be running, today it was from a dying man piece, he jumped over fences and hid beneath the bed to avoid this terrible thing. He kept running until he heard a sound similar to metal scraping on metal, or like a car driving with the brakes on. next thing he noticed a big blue box, he thought it would be a perfect hiding place, who would look in a blue box? When he stepped inside however something was off, he saw the coat tree, and a railing and a big blue pillar in the center, this isn't what struck him as odd, it was the fact that he heard a man talking about the neutrino flow of a banana. This strange man noticed Manic Muse standing in his big blue box and asked inquisitively, ' Odd, Tardis did you let a stray in, this one has a mask aswell, you know I don't like people in masks, who are you?'. The Manic Muse stands there slightly dazed at this peculiar man, he replies' I'm Manic Muse, I am a smart and Shit', to which the Man replies 'Manic Muse.... odd Name.... what planet are you from?', 'Earth is what I tell people, but too be honest I come from a planet called Giggle frump' the Manic Muse said with a grin. ' Who are you odd Man in odd blue box, what Fear do you serve?' He says jumping up and sitting on the railing, ' I'm the Doctor, aren't you surprised this is bigger on the inside?', ' Ofcourse not.... so what fear is it, the Conductor, the Blind Man?' The Manic Muse asks inquisitively. ' The Doctor seems more confused than the bright Muse, 'Fear? the abstract emotion of dread when faced with a dangerous situation?', 'No the warm fluffy feeling of taking someone roughly from behind, of course... did you drop out of another universe or something?', Manic question was answered quickly 'Well I have hopped around my fair share, but I still have no idea what you're on a bout'. Manic Muse asks the Doctor 'Well can you let me out this has got boring quick', the Doctor looked at a screen and let out an, ohhh, of surprise, 'What?' the Muse asked, to which the doctor replied,' that might be a problem..... were not on earth any more.

Third one

I don't know if I should continue doing creepypasta, this is the first man you remember by alliterator.

I swear I can creepy, I swear

My second attempt at doing a creepy pasta, yes I have started this as an project of mine, to read as many ones from faces as I can.

Creepypasta

First Creepypasta reading attempt

Blind Man's Bluff by alliterator

I think my best friend is more emotionally invested in my love life than I am.

I meanseriously, I tell her about stuff and her reaction is AAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, or So CUTE, or the weirdest one yet, Baby Manic's... like.... yeah. But me and my actual girlfriend went through a rough patch with her brother being a dick, and he's finally calmed down, so he's now gunna leave us in peace. On this occasion my best exploded with emotions, going AAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW, and proceeded to have a long one sentence for each statement, like so cute. Baby Manic's. Happy Psycho. It's abit weird, I mean I don't get emotionally invested with the relation ship she has with her bf, if she was in my situation my reaction would be..... K.... as annoying as that may be I am not emotionally invested in her relationship, somehow though she seems to be wedged in the bosom of mine. This leads me to question whether I need a new best friend or if I should have here lobotomised, I'm pretty sure no one would notice *He says looking around suspiciously*

Manic Muse, Dreaming truths, and my life at that point

*pops head out of rock to check the coast is clear, and makes way to computer*

(Warning this is very stream of thought, with terrible grammar, there is more focus on content)

So now it is another soul searching post, probably revealing how shallow and attention seeking I am, and thus why I am such a terrible human being.

Manic Muse was a character I created a few months before I started writing dreaming truths (DT), a blog that just went on, and on, for almost a year. With the lead up however to the making of dreaming truths I had many ideas and the directions it would go, all those factors were accounted for, I needed my protagonist to be compelling, a bit of an arse, but all in all a good person. This left me with a problem I couldn't write a completely new person that early, so I used a framework to build Manic, a lazy waste of intellect, who's life seems meaningless, destroyed, by forces out of his control, in his case Slendy Wendy.

If you got this far and you've seen my fondness for Manic overall you can probably guess that I modeled Manic on myself, you would be right, actually alot of the personality types in Dreaming truths come from friends of mine, I just... exaggerated them. Now I didn't want to make him just me, I at that stage was quite boring, lacked drive, confidence, all these things Manic had which I didn't. This led me to try and make a resolution, I would grow with my character to the point of reason, until he truly went into fiction.

Now, to this day Dreaming truths has gained 2666 pageviews, which when I started would have seemed like a yeah, I'll never reach that, yet here it is I could probably blame the sheer number of posts and if you do the actual math it comes to roughly 20ish people having read it, thought now I concentrate more on writing than having it  read, I have a secret one which I have started that I won't release until next month or later. I actually still remember the first post I made, seeing 1 page view, 2, 5, 7, 10, then I started to reply to comments, Manic wasn't a fully settled character and I wasn't fully prepared for the attention it got, people I had been reading for the past 6-8 months reading what I wrote and commenting. I won't lie I was so nervous I started shaking and sweating like it was a sauna, I was nervous as hell, desperate to stay in character and make a good impression. After a while however activity died down, I had probably over egged whatever I was trying to achieve, and my confidence took an according blow. The blog still tumbled on regardless, got a little crossover wit ha blog ran by soulpatched, I like to think we helped each other though it's very unlikely I helped.

Now as the months tumbled by I kept going, never actually acquiring a great number of views, but I was getting more confident, I would no longer sweat and shake writing a post, no one had said it was terrible, alright it may not be literary genius but it's not complete rubbish. Unfortunately I had got bored writing just the Slender Man and I didn't know how much cohesion there was between the things called Fears I had read very little about. During part of DT you will notice that the posts are more sloppy and depressing with gaps longer than 2 or 3 days I was having writers block and going through a bout of depression, to be honest I think Manic saved me, standing out in front drawing me forwards even taunting me slightly, my creation was stronger than me, so I came back I think more solid, got out more, hang out with more people joined a rugby club and express my long standing love for Rugby, even got a girlfriend. As Manic rises generally I rise, when he falls the same, by the time I was coming to the end of DT I thought I could live without Manic, who at this point had basically become a persona for me, I would turn into Manic when I needed confidence, or do something I was scared to do. Unfortunately I made a bo bo towards the end, I was finding it hard to find an end for Manic, also my GF at the time, saw that I was become stressed with the blog and used to not sleep sometime thinking of stories, thinking how to write it. I looked for an easy fix, so I trolled for an already existing creature to help speed that along whilst resolving the son issue, unfortunately in my haste I neglected to look for any open source thing, so then came the the little trouble with the forum, the final test of my confidence I've come to see it, I was told that I had used characters I shouldn't and I said I was sorry, deleted the relevant post, and I was fine, I didn't feel any crushing sense of worthlessness, I shrugged it off and created the Ticking man to fulfill the purpose I needed, and then the blog finished, I laid Manic to permanent rest fallen to the creature he had run from all the time protecting he loves, a fitting death to a character so important to me.

That didn't last long obviously, I became a part of the fear mythos forum, about a month maybe two after the end, and I still can't let go of Manic.

-Manic Muse (Writer)

Ok, Ok I'll do it

Two in a day apparently this isn't enough about me, Manic the Person behind the horror facade, even though I write, watch, breath, bleed and dream in horror. But yes, apparently I should tell you a little bit more about myself, which I find a bit uncomfortable, well considering I'm part of the fear mythos lets use that as a starting point. As I've said before I play Rugby, a fun, brutal sport, and I earn my money doing laboring, or manual labor, for the americorns, so it's easy to see I am quite an active person, and maybe I don't properly fit into the mythos as I myself don't feel alienated from society, or enjoy the company of the internet, I don't try and seek an escape from my life, I just don't like 'people'. Wandering off though, I have a nightmare, well recently I never had a nightmare before, I wake up and try to get out of bed to find that my legs don't work, which already sends me into a panic so great my heart starts going, I call for help and no one comes, I crawl out of the room and still can't get up. I mange to slide myself downstairs but slip and hit my head, I wake up in a hospital, no one is there again, I wait for a day, bemoaning the lose of my legs, crying, I never cry and I mean never, teh dream then just consists of me trying to get out of the bed and being put back in by something until I feel something in me die, or wither, or just fade.

MY legs to me mean my freedom, I'm good at something I'm fast, I fly when I run, in my soul I am free for just a few minutes, and when I score a try in a match my soul soars to an unimaginable height. This may make me look like a person who is not very deep or sensitive, but that's just how I am, I fear being alone, I fear being a prisoner in my own body, I fear never being able to fly again.

-The person you call Manic

Oh, life blog how I neglect thee

Well, I guess when there's nothing to particularly moan, complain or angst about I like to keep my life to myself, although I keep getting told to be more open, am example of this was provided yesterday when my bestfriend of almost 4 years asked me what my favorite colour was, favorite food, what the name of my 4 sisters were. She was the one that pointed out I am a very she didn't say secretive but maybe it was guarded. I'm not introverted by any means, but guarded yes..... why do you want to know about my life.... are you spies, tell me, What!is your name? WHAT! is your number? and WHAT! is the square root of 467? Hmmmmm, I'm already running out of things to say, but I don't like sharing, sooooooo, sod off for now, but I'm sure I love you somewhere in my heart....... somewhere, deepdown, possibly with my conscience and common decency.

Bye,
Manic

Life starts getting back to normal

Lets see, So in the past two.... three weeks, I have sorted things out with my friend, who then helped me sort out things with my ex...... and I have a course that should help me get work double quick.

Manic, might be back sooner than expected

Let's just say it's been a long old month

Lets see, first thing no more girlfriend, which my best friend found absolutely hysterical, as she's the one usually single, and even know her boyfriend, who I call epsilon, as he's low on the male hierarchy, and is more feminine than my friend. I must admit however my best mate is efficiently a bloke, strange considering my other best mate, he's gay and he is effectively a woman, why am I friends with these people?

*Voice in head* 'I think the wiser question is why are they friends with you'
Shut up who asked you?
:P
X(

Yeah but me actual bestmate, the girl one, she has also turned on me always looking at me bored and with disgust, I blame Epsilon, he's trying to get her to become more like him, she actually has problems she sees a Psych for but she always goes for fucked up guys, so I have to be there at the end to pick up the pieces, yet now she's not treating me well, when in a few weeks time she'll be crying on my shoulder, as I try to convince her not to hurt herself. Like the last guy she dated he fucked about with her feeling, she basically loved him, me and her brother always thought he was a dick but said nothing, this guy proceeded to cheat on her, she didn't get angry she didn't blame him, just said they 'never made it exclusive', ME and her brother promised if we ever saw his canadian face again we'd batter him, she barely made it through,

Due to this and me becoming recently unemployed I had to stop writing for the Fear Mythos, which I technically didn't want to do, but it distracted me, and unbeknownst to me was causing quiet a bit of stress. Since I stopped writing properly I have been able to cut down on smoking, relax more, I still need to sort my life out but atleast I feel a bit more positive about it, hopefully I can go back in a months time and be in high spirits, hopefully.

Hiatus Creepypasta

                                                                  Are You Afraid Yet?

Tick, Tick, Tick; that’s how it’s been all my life, in every second, the tick, going forever. Some days I wish it would end, contemplated ending it all but what if it followed me? I say I thought about it, the ticking however didn’t leave much room for me to think about that, it drove me forwards, relentlessly…. Into eternity. I couldn’t even escape it in my dreams, in fact that was where it was always strongest, when the barriers between what was ‘real’ and what wasn’t were weakest, where reality and impossibility are the same things. Since the ticking has been with me since I was born it means I was never good at making friends, made me withdrawn, everything became an obsession a repetition, repetition was the key, and people weren’t part of that routine. Followers… disciples…. Expendables they were useful, they became part of the routine, my grand scheme, but I was alone always alone.

I guess that’s the life we lead though, no matter how hard we fight, we all end up alone in eternity. So we all live secluded in our own little corners of creation, corners we’ve made for ourselves, we become safe from the world, perfect in our isolation, if we chose to maintain it.

Now due to our kind being seldom seen we are brushed off as dreams and….. nightmares, held dearest in the darkest recesses of the human mind. We may be safe from the world …… but we will show the world is not safe from us.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

A creepy pasta about 'The Quiet'

                                                             A Still Life

Have you ever noticed there's a lot of noise around these days? Cars speeding along, their horns blaring. People are always talking or, rather, shouting at each other. I'd prefer to live in my dream, a dream I had one night, where it was all gone and everything was peaceful and calm, safe, like in a womb.

The day I met up with my friend she was being excessively noisy as usual, talking about people I couldn't give less of a shit about, but I grinned and bore it. I eventually just closed my eyes and went back to my dream, to the peace, wishing she would stop. When I opened my eyes next...she was gone. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit pleased, but I'm sure I should have heard her leave. She always makes a big fuss about doing the tiniest things, so I waited ten minutes in case she just popped to the loo, but she didn't come back. I went looking for her outside, but she wasn't there either. I reasoned she probably got offended that I was ignoring her and left without saying anything. I'd just have to go to her house and apologize tomorrow.

After a night of my parents arguing, yet again, I went to my friend's house to see if she was there. I knocked on the door as usual and greeted them as I normally do and asked if she was in. They looked at me blankly and asked if I had the right house. This was weird. When I tried to show I knew them by telling them things about their lives they got creeped out and threatened to call the police, so I left. It wasn't worth getting the police involved in anyway. I took a bus home, since usually it helps me clear my head as people are usually quiet and keep to themselves on public transport. Not that day, that day a scabby little shit was playing their music at an obnoxiously loud volume for all to hear. The worst thing was he was right behind me. I tried to tune him out and ignore him. I eventually resorted to closing my eyes and covering my ears. I still heard the music blaring in that unintelligible bass, however, and as I reached my breaking point, I wished he would vanish off the face of the planet, that he never existed. I got up to shout at him but his seat was empty. He was gone, without a trace, and I knew he had been behind me a second ago. The bus driver and the other passengers didn't show any reaction to what had happened. At this point, even I was getting a little freaked out.

Getting home was my only concern then. I would focus, then I would find out what happened to them, what was happening around me. It was unfortunate, though, that my parents were arguing when I got home. I avoided them and went to my room. I started to search the web for anything I could, to try and explain what was happening, but all I found was nothing. After two tiring hours I gave up, but they were still arguing and the baby was screeching, that fucking noisy baby, and I wished, oh god why did I wish, I wished for silence. I went to the peaceful place and then the silence came: no shouting, no screeching, no noise at all. I went downstairs and saw my parents sitting watching television. I asked if one of them should check on Connor because he'd stopped crying and they gave me the same look my friend's parent's did. This was when I started to properly panic. Had I just make my little brother disappear? I tried explaining it to my parents, but they didn't understand. Eventually, they checked me in to a mental health clinic.

The psychiatrist there was the worst, always talking, making noise, wanting me to join in, trying to disprove what I knew was real. He said that the things I believed were fiction, stories I had created. It got too much for me. I tried to visualize the peace then: I closed my eyes and ears to the world, but when I opened them he was still there. 

I had to take matters into my own hands. It was quiet the night I snuck out, I was quiet when I crept up behind him, I was quiet as I took the jagged piece of broken light bulb and dragged it across his throat. In that moment he was perfect and silent. 

As snow fell around me, I went home and curled up in my bed. I was woken up a few hours later by a violent shaking: my parents looked like they were shouting at me, but I couldn't hear them. Still, they were disturbing the peace of the morning, so again I took the broken light bulb from under my pillow and made them perfect.

The sirens came the next day, as the snow kept falling. I hated the noise, I despised it. I saw the police, I saw the world, I heard every noise, every person, every animal, every noisy thing, and I wished...and the world became peaceful and perfect.

It's been two days since the sirens stopped, but something doesn't feel quite right, like the peace is incomplete. I went outside but the snow hasn't stopped. The people are gone and so are the noises they made. I stopped and listened and I heard my own heart beating, thumping away. It consumed my entire world, my entire being. The peace was being disturbed. There was only one option.

There will be peace, there will be perfection, there will be complete, unbroken Quiet.

Slender Vlogs

New Marble Hornets video and Dark Harvest, is it me or do these seem to be running out of steam and abit stale. I mean I would love if EMH were still making videos, especially with crazy Evan, Me I like that shit.

Are there any other good Fear or Slender Vlogs I should watch apart from Tribe Twelve or the 5zero people. I haven't really watched any Fear vlogs so if you have any suggestions they would be appreciated

-Real Manic Guy

Reasons

I guess I should give a reason I'm not posting to Timor, Life by clockwork or Apple a day for a few days, is because I just feel a bit shit, due to everything from having to break up with my Girlfriend because of her dick of a brother, to my Nan being on her last legs.

Life's just being a bitch, especially with some shit, my friends have stirred up which essentially means I've been excommunicated and am the focus point for a lot of ridicule, and work, I'm tired all the time and sad, and the thought has come to me to just top meself , but there are people that still like me, IRL, not on the forum, to them I'm just a name on the screen, no people I know would be extremely sad if I went, but it still comes that thought, and it does seem very attractive.

-Real Manic

Nooooo, Mr Manic no here

we need lemon pledge.

Mr Manic have bad week, very bad week, he no longer want to talk in first person.

Basically his Girlfriends brother who's a complete and utter bollock, decided that he wanted revenge for a time Manic retaliated against a cowardly punch to the back of the head the brother delivered. SO he devised a scheme to make his sisters life miserable so Manic being a true gentleman would have to stop the relationship, because he wouldn't want his girlfriend to be hurt by such a complete and utter Prat (Being polite sucks). So Manic is once again alone in the world with his computer screen and the many many blogs one of which he despises.

Manic may not be writing for a while for anything other than Timor Biblotheca, Manic's sad.

-Third person Manic

First serious post

Well I'll take a whack at writing a serious post on my supposedly silly personal blog, this is me taking time to relax, tragic I know, I'm writing this thing here instead of a life by clockwork one is because I have sort of experienced writers block, combined with me wanting to upload a video which I don't have means I'm don't want to write for that just yet. This on the other hand I noticed whilst staying with my family, which is comprised of children aged between 26 and 19, so all adults.

I noticed that in families when the group is comprised mainly of adults there is an odd state of affairs, there are occasions when you don't see your family members that also live in the house for days at a time, such as my 23 YO sister, I haven't seen her for a week basically, because of work and social things when she's back from work I'm usually out doing rugby training, meeting friends,  going to a piss up, or helping out at the scouts or cubs. When I'm in and relaxing she is usually out having a good time with her friends.

I believe these types of situations have led to a sort of disassociation with the family, such as is seen in 1984. The family is separated for most of the time, and when there is free time they actually lack the energy to stay in each others company, therefore weakening the bond between family members.

With this lack of empathy for people you are related possibly leading to apathy towards others, leading to isolation and an inability to make lasting relationships. Making it so that the individual only feels real worth in their work, so by the reasoning I have shown, Capitalism kills the family and spawns the next generation of capitalist workers by alienating them from the family and any other form of human reciprocity.

Making the only relationships they do form mainly a cushion to ease and distract them from the reality of being a wage slave. With the image of the family inspiring the need for one as then the worker will work longer to try and support them and make their lives better. This benefits capitalism by forcing more work out of a single individual by making him do 2 peoples work at a rate that isn't equivocal to that of two people doing the same work.

Just a thought I had, see yah guys

-Manic

Manic is not having a good day

No he is not, especially when Manic refers to himself in the third person, hmmmmmmm, doesn't help matters that I'm trying to give up smoking, nor that my Girlfriend's younger brother is a dick who likes to annoy me, at every opportunity, nor that the amount of shit I have to deal with from organisations I'm part of including Scouts, Cubs, add a massive job hunt.

Manic wouldn't mind killing someone especially for a cigarette, damn people I've got watching me to make sure I don't sneak out caught me, damn I was outsmarted by myself. Fuck it out the window.

The thing is.... I'm not joking.

-Manic

Some days I dislike blogger

I made a video for life by clockwork regarding the ticking man, and blogger won't let me upload, it is the file too large or am I being an idiot and have to upload it to Youtube first?

It took me like an hour to get a version I liked, so I want to post it, so please if you do know how I can get it up please enlighten me, for I am no master of the internet, I don't even know how to make a wiki page, so yeah advice pls

:)

-Manic

Yeah we won

I am tired and achy, I we won in the last match by 5 points in the 2nd last play of the game, with the last play was being made was done so, basically on our try line, just because a guy knocked it on. But we got it and knocked it onto touch and we one, it was a tense game, and I have been sleeping off all the aches and pains I have acquired from it, I still can't hear out of my left ear properly, which was the first injury I got, but it's got slightly better.

Not as bad as the guy that tore his biceps though, oh fuck that was rough.

The Club house after wards was pretty empty, especially considering we won.

So go First team, back to winning form, and hopefully the guy who tore his bicep will get better soon.

-Manic

Arghhhhh, my nose aches

Just my luck the first rugby training session of the year ends with me being clothes lined twice, now I have a very sore nose and right cheek. Also get kicked in the knee 5 times doesn't help, resulting in when I tried picking up one of my female friends after practice, my knee exploded in pain still aches a little bit, it helped to sort the pain out when I saw here younger brother coming back and saw his ridiculous . The same artsy one that drew Manic, she wants to make some comedy horror shorts, to be honest they sound like good chuckle worthy things.
But yeah that's about it not that interesting just annoyed,

Also I want a bacon sandwich  cause I am hungry.

-Manic

Heyyyya

Because most of you already see me and know who I am already this is just a general post so it's not so empty, I'm still Manic, but maybe some real life info is needed, if anyone is interested. I am indeed 19, unfortunately my life is not made more interesting by being chased by an assortment of fears and maniacs..... Well fears atleast.

I play Rugby every Saturday for a N. London amateur team, and currently in the main am unemployed.

As for my political leanings, I generally reserve an apathy towards the political parties of today, seeing as you are either incredibly radical or irritably liberal in society, so much so it doesn't matter what the issues are because they will always mindlessly fight regardless of the issues if they 'think' it's in the name of liberty.
Don't get me wrong I do have political views, an opinions on the matters of today, tbh I may rage an obscene amount about them but, I'll try to keep the ranting to a minimal.

Oh I also have a three legged dog, she falls over a lot.

(Let the stream of consciousness floow)

-Manic :)